There’s Nothing “Incognito” About Richie’s Behavior

Posted: November 11, 2013 in Uncategorized
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Ah, Richie Incognito and the Miami Dolphins; this month’s flavor of social controversy has everything that TMZ (Joe Buck’s favorite website) and ESPN could hope for. Heck, it even has some things that Joe Buck’s second favorite website (see Lange, Artie) would appreciate. Racism, sexual harassment, lewd voicemails…the United States Congress can’t even hold a flame to Incognito when it comes to lascivious behavior.

When the news first came out about Incognito’s aggressive voicemails to teammate Jonathan Martin, public opinion was mostly united against the former Nebraska Cornhusker. After all, acting in defense of someone who has the gall to call an African-American a “half n—” or the impotence to suggest that he would “slap your real mother across the face” is not endearing in the least. Unless, of course, you’re in the Miami Dolphins locker room.

Many players inside this corrosive environment suggested that Incognito was an “honorary black.” Now, I’m not exactly sure what one has to do to become an “honorary black.” But, based on Incognito’s success in achieving the feat, I can only assume that it’s given out much like honorary degrees to Ivy League schools are syphoned to any and every B-list celebrity that’s willing to give a commencement address or pony up the dough to attend for a semester.

Obviously, I’m not black (although, if I were a Miami Dolphin, I could be an honorary one). So, crying over this controversy is a lot like a one-percenter claiming that illegal aliens are ruining the economy. Dude, you’re a billionaire, illegal aliens haven’t done anything to you (other than when the pool boy slept with your wife. But, who hasn’t?). So, to coin an old slogan from a fast food joint in the seventies; where’s the beef? I’m not black, nor am I a racist. So, I suppose I don’t have a real horse in this race, right? Wrong. I side with common decency, I side with common sense, and I side with the right to work at your profession without the threat of bullying, prejudice, or assault.

Richie Incognito, for all his faults, is not a “bad” man. He’s never killed anyone (that we know of). He’s never raped anyone (or at least no one willing to admit that they’d slept with this), and he’s never been arrested (though he probably should have been for this costume). No, Incognito is not a bad man; he is a stupid man. He’s a man dumb enough not to know the difference between playful teasing and verbal blitzkrieg; a man foolish enough to think that he’s the victim whilst screaming “Mike Pouncey, n—” whilst shirtless in what has to be the least savory watering hole in Red America. No, Incognito is not a bad man. He is an ignorant man in a country where ignorance has become prideful.

The Tea Party, born from the fibers of hatred, shredded from the dying dynasty of the neo-conservatives in 2008, has made ignorance “chic” again in America. Instead of merely disagreeing with your political opposites; it is now necessary to hate them. Instead of living harmoniously with all people, we are taught that those who are different than us cannot possibly be of equal nature. Yes, ignorance is “in” again and it’s people like Richie Incognito who feast on its power. After all, ignorance is the ultimate power. When people are ignorant, they can be controlled. Ignorance, in a world where a simple “tweet” can reach the moon and beyond, is the birthplace of all evil.

No single phrase greater personifies this than a quote by Dr. Martin Luther King. “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.” In Richie Incognito, I think we have found a 320 pound bastion of both.


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